I realised that I'm really blessed and fortunate but yet i don't in enough effort to prove myself and do justice to myself. Lit used to be my favourite subject and rnj and chrysalids are such nice and though-provoking or emotional (for rnj probably hahha) books but i don't appreciate the fact that i'm able to study them and i just researched a little on chrysalids and the amount of information i can find online about it is WOAH i'm blown away i have 6 tabs opened it's 11.33 and i wanna sleep but really interested to read everything too though :( God give me the strength to carry on it's the first day of term 1 week 10 which means 4 more days till the end of term 1. 1/4 of the year has passed already i STILL don't have enough self control and discipline. i need to get my priorities right. I PROMISED MYSELF and i can't afford to break this promise (to myself) okay i should stop ranting and gibber nonsense this post makes no sense to a certain extent but, sudden urge to at least show some evidence and reminder for myself that: THERE ISN'T MUCH TIME LEFT SO RIGHT AFTER I TYPE THIS i better proceed on with my revision and sleep early and give my best in everything and tomorrow shall be a better day. I can do this. I can. I will. I can. There is no reason as to why I can't. So I've got to. (i have to make sure my actions speak louder than my words)